Oh man.... We're so rusty in jumping. Ugh... I told Beth that I needed to not cry today and have a good ride. And well, it didn't start out great. I basically had to tell myself to suck it up and not cry and just listen and learn and do better. And it worked. I focused on riding better and it got better. And then at the end of the lesson I told Beth that I was embarassed to admit it, but... it just not kind of dawned on me that in most of my jump lessons it takes about 2/3 of the way through for us to get it together. And in my mind, it was because Dan was behind my leg and sluggish and wasn't really game and into it until about 2/3 of the way through. It was like he suddenly woke up and realized we were jumping and got energized. And sadly, I just NOW realized... it's not Dan. DUH. It's ME!!! Beth laughed and before I said that I realized it was me, she was like "are you sure you want me to respond to that?!". Ha ha.. Nope. I get it now. I wasn't creating the right canter until 2/3 through my lessons. Ugh... 
So okay... how do I get that canter? Remember that lesson where I get Dan to lengthen at the canter but into a shorter neck (which really means proper connection/on the bit/whatever term gets me to actually ride a proper canter). Basically Beth told me to ride my second level medium canter. Ah.... And maybe not exactly that canter, but... the uphill canter, the upper level canter I see in Rusty when he's galloping on XC, the hind legs coming up and underneath and reaching canter, (not the canter where his hind end is trailing behind him), the canter where he's reaching into the bit and a bit ahead of the vertical but not braced in his neck, THAT Canter.... And shockingly (sarcasm there!) it creates a much easier line and jump and course. Oh, and THAT CANTER... MUST BE STRAIGHT!! In other words, his nose needs to stay between his shoulders. And in the beginning, before I had that canter... I was all over the place. I was riding backwards, I was holding, I was abandoning when I needed to hold, I was tipping forward onto my knee, I was ... a hot mess. But when I managed to get that canter, it was easier for me to stay with Dan and not get ahead or behind and it was easier to keep my landing gear in front of me. Sigh... so now.. I just need to get myself in gear in the beginning so that we don't have to do the whole disaster of the first 2/3 of my lessons from now on.
However, we still have that pesky right drift.
But at least we redeemed ourselves.
And after our lesson Dan took a snooze while he was getting bemered. ;) ha ha... The beast sleeps!!!
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