Tuesday, October 11, 2022

All the feelings from us both!

 Man, I'm exhausted. Oh, and.. also probably because of my migraine pill I took. Duh! But still.. it's been a draining day. 

Meg came to help me with the ponies today. She's brilliant. We started with Dan and I told her all the things we've been struggling with. She was very kind and supportive. She did say that his body looked much better, so yay for that!

We started off in the barn and she asked if I wanted to ride. I told her yes, but I would use the bareback pad. I started to groom Dan and he was in full D-rex mode. Chomping, angry, glaring, snarling... VERY much on his worst behavior. It stayed bad when I put the bareback pad on. Meg said that she changed her mind and since he was so angry she wanted to start in hand first. So we pulled the pad off and carried all the stuff up to the arena.

We started with me showing her how things were going with our pillar work. And he was being pretty good, but... she caught onto a lot of things that I needed to tweak. And she had some great ideas to help too!. First... don't click all the time. Every time I click, I need to give a treat within 3 seconds. Otherwise, I can say goodbye or some other "cue" but the click must be followed by a treat. She thought that the neck rope was just making him lift from his neck base, not use the correct muscles to lift so she didn't think I should use it. Drats.. I thought it was helping. Oh well. She did see how he was "over achieving" and throwing things at me instead of listening. And she saw that he was more following my hand in anticipation of a treat than actually doing the motions correctly. So, she took over and tried some things. She had a great suggestion about teaching how to take a treat. No clicking... but hold the treat in my hand with my fist closed over it. He can't get the treat until he politely moves his muzzle away from my hand. And he picked that up quick!!! He's so smart. That will help keep him from getting greedy and snatchy. So from now on, all the time... pillar 1 and no treats unless you back off! Cool! So then, she had me do the pillar work but not necessarily by "tracking". Like, when I point and he follows my hand... he then keeps following my hand around to the treat pouch and then he starts losing the softness. So I could point, but then had to take my hand away and only click and treat when he offers it on his own and stays soft. And then make sure I give the treat with his nose in front of his chest and as close to pillar 1 as possible and only when he stops nibbling on me. Then we worked on me standing at his shoulder instead of his head and him keeping his head neutral and doing pillar one on his own. And then what happens when I move to his haunches?? Does he spin? Yes... ha ha. So we worked on that. This way he has to offer the behavior on his own, which means he's truly using the muscles not just "assuming the position". Okay.. cool! He actually got all soft and doe eyed and sleepy. 

So then we went to pillar 2 and it all fell apart again. She saw what I was saying about he starts just throwing it out there. But we realized some of his pillar 3 instead of pillar 2 is not him overachieving as much as him not figuring out how to unlock his stifle to back up. So he flings side to side instead. And technically, the back up is just pillar 1 in reverse/backing and technically not pillar 2. But regardless, he has to learn how to keep his neck soft and unlock his stifles so he can step back with his hind feet. We did manage to get it. And she said when he offers pillar 3, I can tell him he's a good boy, but unless I'm asking for it or it's 100% correctly done, don't click and reward it. Just ask him to walk forward, leave it alone, and come back to pillar 1 and start over. Also, she said to go ahead and grab hold of the halter near his mouth so that I can redirect him rather than waiting til he bites and punishing him. Because if he bites, it's allowable to punish him, but... in reality, it's my fault for allowing the bite to happen in the first place. 

So then we went to ride. She showed me how she saddles them up when they're like him. So she picked up the bareback pad and walked towards him and he immediately made snarly face and stepped away. So she stopped. Basically... she was waiting for him to soften and relax before she took the next step forward. And not just standing still without pinning his ears.. he had to be soft and relaxed. Sigh.. this could take awhile. But she said that it usually only takes a few times. I asked her how if we allow them to say no and back off... but then slowly keep asking for the next step... do the horses not realize that we're not really allowing them to say no so much as "go slower"? And that ultimately, the saddle still gets put on? She understood what I was asking and said that it was similar to going to the doctors office and getting a physical exam. (or I was thinking going to the gynecologist and having the doctor check your prostrate)! If you're tense and the doctor notices and talks you through the process or slows down a little and waits for you to take a breathe and unclench... the end result is still the same.. you're still getting that thumb up the butt or the shot or whatever, but you at least feel like you have a little more say and it's not so abrupt and rude. Okay.. that makes total sense! It's also probably the whole "the fact that she heard me say no and stepped back a minute instead of carrying forth" thing. The "she heard me". So... okay. It took about 10 minutes to get the saddle on Dan. And sure, I don't always have that luxury, but for now I can do that. So everytime he said no, she backed off a little or stopped and gave him a minute or more, until he relaxed. Similar to Kelli and Marvin's trigger stacking and de-escalation stuff. And she did point out that without being in the cross ties, he was much more willing to back off and away vs snap and snarl and chew at things. Makes sense too. She also said that if the behavior subsides over time... it's behavior. If he persistently and consistently resists, then I should pay attention to where exactly and maybe try to figure out if it's pain and where it's coming from. 

So we got the saddle on. And I told her that with the bridle, he always gets a treat, so he's usually not resistant to that at all. Which, made me wonder.. is it because of the treat or is it because he has some pain in the girth area/withers/back/etc?? We shall see I guess. 

So then I got on and we did pillars under saddle. We talked about how he just tips his nose sometimes instead of really giving. She said perhaps I should try with a bit more contact rather than riding on the buckle and that way I could almost milk him down to a true pillar 1 vs just having him snatch in and out of it. So we tried that and it maybe got a little better. Then she said that perhaps some of his snatching was because he was still out in front of himself so maybe pillar 2 would help. That took some doing too. Again, much harder to rock back and unlock your stifles with mom on board.  Meg came over to help in hand and it did help a bit. She said to just think about bringing my belly button back to my spine and that was a good visual. He's really getting quite good and stopping when I stop my seat from swinging and now he's starting to get the whole pillar 2 and/or pillar 1 in reverse with the belly button trick. Cool! 

We got a few good pillar 2s and finished with a good pillar 1 and then called it quits. He was super good and tried pretty hard. (Except when Funny got too close. ha ha. Then the snarls came out extra hard again. Which makes sense.. she was threatening his cookies, but also.. he was vulnerable and that's hard for us!). 

We turned him out and went to work with Lyric. He's such a good brother. They had all gone into the stalls and she was unhappy having to leave them. I called him and she called him and he wandered up and then hung out at the gate most of the time we were working with her so she wasn't lonely. Such a good big brother!

So yeah... I'm feeling much better about things. Meg was super sweet and told me that I had been doing a good job and not to be so hard on myself. And I feel like with these new tools, I can start making some progress on his general happiness. Oh, and then afterward.. he got snarly again. She was just trying to pet him when we had turned him loose. So she taught him the "hug" game. Which I'm so excited to try out. Basically... when he comes up to me, if I put my palms out facing each other and open, he should put his head/nose between them and soften and lower his head and neck. ONLY when he's soft about it does he get a click and treat. Because otherwise we'll inadvertently teach him to come up and head punch. Doh! So we'll play that game too! But I'm excited. I think we'll be able to make some more progress and I think he'll like his new "games" to play. I honestly think he's a little bored with the repetitiveness of the pillar work and adding these new games will help. And nailing down the specifics a little more. :) 

I should have gotten more photos and vidoes but I was working with him as much as she did and I was so engrossed I didn't get any other than him being moral support for Lyric. 

 



So... some photos from earlier this week. The full moon, sunrise.. Dan sleeping in. :) 


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