Sunday, February 2, 2020

Winter Woolies Show Jumping

Well... that was depressing. Sigh... I would like to get my act together.. at some point. Soon preferably. It's very exhausting and depressing to feel like I've been working sooooo hard at overcoming something and I finally think I can do it...and then I don't. I just don't. Not even that I can't... I just... don't. Sigh.... 

It was a long day and I have a plethora of excuses that I could use, but the fact remains.. I didn't get the job done. 

We got to Ashland at 2:30ish and we were supposed to go around 3:45. Kelli came too and was about to get on so I ran up to check on ride times and the courses. Then I tacked up and met Kelli on her way back. The plan was to ride together a little but I guess I took too long as she was done. Since we still had PLENTY of time... apparently they were running late and it was looking like I had an hour and a half to spare... we went on a trail ride. Dan was WILD! Bouncing and bucking in place while we were walking out to the field, so Kelli sat on the top of the hill while I tried to work him in the XC field. I tried but we ended up just doing two sprint sets up the hill. He didn't even want to gallop flat out as much as he wanted to bounce. Goober. I did manage to get a tiny bit of trot and canter work, but he kept wanting to canter. I finally gave up and told Kelli that he was still bouncy but maybe a trail ride would be best as he seemed to think field work meant canter and buck. She was freezing so we rode back for her jacket and then took a trip to the lake and then back up the steep hill to the back of XC again. And I was right... Dan had settled and was fine with just power walking. We got back to stadium and it looked like there was still a really long time before my ride. We hung out for a bit and chatted with friends. Then Kelli went to get off and untack so I went to the dressage arena and did some w/t/c warm up. I thought he was in front of my leg. He was going with minimal aids, but.. he wasn't charging off or fired up. But I thought it was a good "go". So then we went up to the arena and jumped two cross rails. I thought I still had a whole other division which should have been 30 minutes but apparently not. After I jumped the two cross rails I went to the other side to do the bigger jumps. I got about 2 jumps in when Phoebe asked if I wanted to go next. Umm??? Okay, I guess. So I jumped a few more times and he felt pretty good. The first vertical he jumped me out of the tack! It was like "oh hey!! My SI joints feel good"!. I was actually kind of excited. He felt pretty good and was going and the course looked good. Our first course was decent. I got lost and circled forever trying to remember my course but with some help, I got it and we continued on our way. It wasn't terrible. I felt like we had a few sucked back fences but I thought I had fixed him. I even thought I remembered to "test" if he was in front of my leg and thought that the answer was yes.. he is. So then we did the second round at novice and it was okay but a little worse. We ended up putting 3 strides in the two strides, but we got around. I felt like I held to some and that's what was causing him to add. Kelli mentioned that he was getting strung out in between the fences and that I was then panicking and holding him at the fence, so that she suggested I package him a bit more between the fences so that I could then press to the fence. Seems legit... (Except.. I know better than to listen to people.. I just need to go back to what Kelly and I have been working on for so long... I don't know WHY WHY WHY I forget this)... 




I sat a smidge and then jumped one more fence while they raised them to training height. For a split second I got nervous but then it was time to go again. And then it started to fall apart. I'm not sure exactly what happened... but we ended up getting to the base of every fence and he'd shut off the power, add a stride, and basically jump straight up and down over the fence. I don't know how he didn't get a rail... My back is literally spasming because of it. It was awful. I couldn't get him to go... couldn't get him to take off. And then we went in for our final round and it got even worse. To the point that he refused the oxer and then would not take it. Like.. he said NOPE... I had to go around it eventually. I finally finished over the two stride, in three... so I came back to it and got a better jump in, but he still pitched a third stride in. I went back out to warm up and jumped the vertical which was good and out of stride, except he knocked the whole thing down. Then we jumped the oxer out of stride, so I quit. Plus at this point it was dark out and everyone wanted to go home. Sigh... 









What... the.... Eff??? Why did it go south and so dramatically? And why did it not even start out that good. So now I'm wondering if Dan is hurting... is it me? Did I throw him off... is he just being an asshole now and slamming on the breaks at the last second because? I don't think I'm holding or asking him to stop, but... I am tipping my shoulders a hair at him. Or is he pulling my shoulders??? It's so embarassing. And do disheartening that people are watching... And if another person says "you should send him to a trainer for a few months.. or at least let a professional ride him a few rides" I'm going to cry. Or like another person, who meant well, but it still stung.... said "Give me two weeks with you guys, we'll have you back to normal". Seriously?! ! I've been fighting this fight since Spring of last year... I'm soooooo over it. Why? Why can't I fix this? Why is it so hard? 
 The good news is that the few jumps we did jump out of stride... we both look pretty decent :) So yay for that.... 








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