Body Frustrations

Sigh... A frustrating lesson today. Danny was pretty good but I am frustrated with myself and my body. 

We started out with a quick little hack as Cindy was in the outdoor arena with Dagney. Dan was a bit rowdy as we worked around the edge but once we went within the white poles, he was sane. ;) Weirdo. After a few little laps around at the trot, we moved inside because Cindy was cold. The sun was nice but the wind was brutal. 

After we went in, she went to use the restroom and Dan decided that it was time to be stupid. He did his bulging right shoulder, grab the right rein, and bolt right trick. Ugh.. So I countered with flexing and bending him to the right to get his shoulders straight again and trying to work through it. We got through it but admittedly, it irritated me and I couldn't seem to let it go. Then I was frustrated with him and then it progressed to frustrated with me. Sigh... 

So anyways... We got a mediocre trot but a really nice canter. However, I couldn't sit it. I don't know if it's because of what I'm trying to do with my body, or if it's because Dan really needed to be adjusted, or because his canter was that nice and I really have no core. Sigh... I could do one of the 5 things, but not all 5 at once. I couldn't get my toes pointing in, my legs on, without my knee creeping up the knee block, with my butt in the saddle and flowing and not bouncing up and down in the tack, without falling forward or letting my leg swing back. In order to get my toes from pointing out, I seem to have to grip with my thighs and knees almost, which seems wrong somehow. And then I end up popping up out of the saddle. When I sit my butt in the saddle, my toes point out and/or my leg creeps up the thigh block. 

I can't figure it out. And it's driving me batty! I don't know if lunge lessons would help... or make it worse. If no stirrup work would help...or make it worse. Or if it's my beloved beautiful amazing saddle. Or my weak weak cruddy core and horrid posture... 

I'm hoping that I can work on it some this week and then get help figuring it out at the biomechanics clinic this weekend. Dan should be sound so I can address it. 

We did have better luck at the counter canter though. Cindy said that now that he's not as likely to swap, I need to keep his canter from getting longer. I got it a little bit but the right lead is just a little tougher because it's such a delicate balance. 

I think part of it is that I'm frustrated with life now. I'm feeling frustrated that my body isn't cooperating. Maybe it's cause I'm turning 39 too. Then I'm a little frustrated with my job. I love it. And I enjoy it. But it's starts to get a little monotonous, in theory. Not really when I pay attention but when I'm having to rush, it's getting a bit monotonous. And I feel like I am losing all of my vet knowledge and falling way behind. But I don't really want to go back to being a traditional vet. I'm still not quite ready to start having to kill things and make people cry. And I certainly don't have time to do both.. but I feel like I want to, so I don't lose it. So I'm frustrated with that. 

I'm the Queen of being frustrated with things that are impossible... wanting my cake and being able to eat it to. And not doing anything about it. Which frustrates me more as I'm frustrated that I'm frustrated but not doing anything about it. Good grief!!!
 
Maybe I just need another gallop.....